Film Review: Seattle Superstorm

If ever there was an antidote for people having second marriages and merging their children together – this film is it!

The Premise

After a strange unidentified object is shot out of the sky and crashes into Seattle strange storms begin to occur meaning death to us all!

The Disasters Faced

Meteors, storms, lightning, botox, having the most annoying children in the history of cinema, tentacles and a lack of water to survive. Not in that order either!

The Execution

As usual with these SyFy movies, you know the effects will be bad, the premise crazy and things will generally be ok in the end. What I didn’t account for was the sheer unlikability of any of the characters what so ever. Emma our lead lady is dating Tom whom has moved his son and himself closer to be with her and her whiny daughter and all she does is be vague about their relationship. Her daughter antagonises his son who lacks any personality or void spark of life and they spend the vast majority of their scenes arguing. I guess its a testament to their acting skills that I detested them that much! Elsewhere the characters aren’t as lame but they have so little to work with, you’ve guessed who will die within their opening exchanges on screen. What I did enjoy was that the movie starts out at the height of the movie – leaves you on a cliffhanger and then goes back 9 hours to lead you back to that point. There’s also a decent amount of mystery as to what the meteor object is that crashes down even if it is very Star Trek about how its all solved.

The Effects

SyFy are gradually improving their hazy grey look of the old tornado’s slowly but what I found strange was that the whole movie palette had a grey tint to it. I wonder if it was used to try and blend the CGI in a little better. Space Needle falling takes dubious effect award – why did anyone build a tower that’s anorexic like that anyway – it’s bound to topple over!

Why Its Worth Watching

This movie has a bit more Sci-Fi to it than other disasters and whilst the acting isn’t awful, it’ll certainly get you by. I generally can tell the acting standard by how much botox the lead lady looks to have had but Ona does well (plus I can’t tell if its the eyebrows that makes it look like she’s botox’d to the hills or not). Aside from that, its a very standard disaster fare with little to stand out.

Best Character

I’m struggling here – possibly Matty Finochino as the only normal guy in the film, Ben. Nice guys always bite it!

Best Death

It has to be Jacob being struck by lightning! He just evaporates into flaming shoes! It needed a comedy cue…

Weirdest Moment

Most of scenes involving token Russian Dimitry. He has a permanent “wahhhh???” expression on his face for the first hour and why on earth he is in the movie at all is beyond me. The closing moment is strange too. The family of four cuddled on a balcony deciding where to have their wedding. “Can you chose somewhere a little less destroyed?” says the boy and we cut to picture of a pristine Seattle. What are you saying man!?!

Conclusion

Usually I enjoy bad films. This is just bad. The characters are awful, the family has a death touch to anyone that comes near them – no wonder they are so mucked up! This is an exercise in how not to do character development.

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One Comment on “Film Review: Seattle Superstorm”

  1. Sylvia November 4, 2012 at 4:31 am #

    Oh, so I’m not the only person who made it through this awful film? What really got me is that the Lt. Cmdr. was never in uniform. Plus the fact that no other military officials seemed to be involved at all, not even over the phone. It was just her tussling with that civilian official like they were the only authorities on earth. Now that’s low budget!

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