Archive for david lewis

Film Review: Polar Storm

Posted in Polar Storm with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 29, 2012 by Higher Plain Music

By placing the word storm on the end of a TV disaster movie hopes generally aren’t high for what is to come. Strangely though, there is really no storm in sight and the film is actually quite competent! Shocks all round then.

The Premise

A close passing meteor sheds its bum which crashes into Earth and rips the electromagnetic properties of our planet to shreds. The poles of Earth decide to do a switcheroo and that’s when its time to end the world.

The Disasters Faced

Meteor’s, earthquakes, EMP’s, a dodgy pace maker and a child so is trying soooo hard to be like Justin Bieber it hurts me on the inside.

The Execution

Whilst Polar Storm is heavily reliant on some of the most dubious science found in a recent disaster flick, it goes with it and fully commits to it with gusto. Whilst the film is clearly done on a shoestring budget, the actors involved aren’t slouching and get on with it too and this elevates the dull script. The film has three distinct acts. The meteor coming to Earth, the EMP dramas and the solution to any b-movie ever made – some nuclear bombs to round-up. Sadly the third act is so reliant on CGI that just doesn’t cut it, the film ends damply but it is solid enough up until then to hold your attention.

The Effects

The meteor, its crash and the earthquake effects are passable. What is not is the awful submarine effects in the final half hour which completely shatter any illusion you’ve been trying to pretend you’re in. It’s like an early PlayStation 2 FMV sequence.

Why Its Worth Watching

Polar Storm is well paced and doesn’t use all its cards in the first twenty minutes. It’s full of clichés and disaster movie must haves like moody teenagers, the loveable old man, daddy issues and the government once again not acting on advice. Those of you looking for the drinking game, take a shot whenever teenage Shane tries to look innocent/sexy at the camera is a slightly awkward Bieber pose.

Best Death

I’ll go for Michael (Rob Morton) as the best death when his pace maker decides to give out on an EMP and he does the best death fall in the movie.

Favourite Character

Every few characters are really nice or given much in the way of character development but Marsha Regis’ Pam is always a good lady to declare the end of the world with. I’m sure everyone would have been a bit calmer if she was more involved.

Weirdest Moment

Aside from the science side of the whole film which is just silly, notice that the film seems to use the same two roads over and over for everyone to stop during an EMP pulse – in some cases in the exact same spot! It just made me laugh.

Conclusion

Not bad enough to be a classic, it is an interesting concept of EMP’s causing havoc that keeps things in motion. It may fall flat with awful CGI in the final third and have some improbable moments but hey – what other disaster movies aren’t taking liberties with reality these days! Passable TV affair.

Film Review: Ba’al The Storm God

Posted in Ba'al The Storm God with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 19, 2010 by Higher Plain Music

I don’t really know where to start. It’s not even a proper disaster movie. Infact, its so bad its sub movie altogether. Ba’al ends up being such a mish mash of nothing it ruins itself before we can turn it off. Bad. Bad. Bad. So that means we’ve got to watch it in fascination right? Good!

The Premise

Some polystyrene statues house Ba’al The Storm God who wants to wreak havoc on the world. Apparently.

The Disasters Faced

A storm God, very heavy polystyrene statues, lots of sandstorms, thunder, lightning, rain, awful acting, rubber swords and evil clouds.

The Execution

My main problem is that its billed as a disaster movie yet it plays out more like one of those dreaded low budget treasure hunt films you watch when you’re desperately bored. It involves lots of pointing at maps, shouting things like “this is impossible” and plot lines of double crosses on your double crosses that were already triple crossed the last scene. For once we’re spared for the most part of any romantisisms from our lead duo though so we can thankful for some small mercies!

However one thing that does seem to gel well is the general acting approach as the cast clearly realise that in order to get any kind of entertainment from what’s left, a slightly tounge in cheek approach (a bit like The Mummy but not as good) is used. Infact The Mummy appears to have influnced a lot of things in the film. Ba’al likes to form his face in the storm clouds, make massive sand storms and even our lead looks like Brendan Fraser. This lends itself to feeling overly familiar without being actually good at anything and therefore just feels completely by numbers and missable.

The Effects

The sandstorm effects aren’t bad to be fair and the varied locations make for some plesant scenary. Where it falls down is on the statues that appear to wobble when inserting “gems”. Some of the Ba’al effects looks suspicious too, but for TV affair its far from offensive.

Why It’s Worth Watching

It’s not!

Although that’s a bit of a sweeping statement. Disasters are often referred to but kept off screen and so you’re left with a rotten treasure hunt. I suppose seeing the baddie come a cropper is always worthwhile.

Best Death

Again death by statue early on wins the day, followed by… well death by statue again at the end of the movie! Maybe the film needs to be renamed Ba’al The Death Statue!

Favourite Character

It is very hard to pick out a character as likeable. The leading duo are paper thin, the baddie isn’t really bad enough to be thought of as devilish and Ba’al never really makes an appearance. I think I’ll go for the bit part of Innuit Guard played by Duane Howard who promtly ditches all the main characters in a desert trench early on and spouts a load of prophetic warnings before driving off full pelt in the car. Yes, the barrel has been scraped!

Weirdest Moment

The way how when running around on their treasure hunt, everyone comes up with the most insane explanations for everything as if we were ever stupid to think otherwise with the underwater gem being the worst culprit.

Conclusion

Inept, non disasterish and just damn right dull, Ba’al is more of a storm in a teacup than an end of the world kick ass God. This is barely a disaster movie in any respect and I was sorely dissapointed – even for a TV movie!

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 176 other followers