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Film Review: Dinocroc Vs Supergator

Posted in Dinocroc Vs Supergator with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 14, 2011 by Higher Plain Music

Now I know some films embrace their b-movie side with great aplomb but Dinocroc Vs Supergator takes this to a whole new level. The acting is almost purposefully bad, the CGI is hilarious and the script looks like it’s doing a hop-skip-jump to miss story beats. So did I enjoy it? Hell yeah!

The Premise

Genetically enhanced Crocs and Gators escape a science compound on an Island and decide to go for lunch on the general public. Tasty!

The Disasters Faced

Giant hungry animals, offensively poor acting skills and a shoddy doctor who instead of helping someone having a heart attack just cries and screams at the guy instead.

The Execution

We know the drill in general with SyFy films, they’re outwardly awful – but that’s the whole point. They have now gained a cult following over time and while there’s not much in the way of new TV disaster movies or bigger budget ones being made elsewhere, these are tiding me over. I’d prefer bigger budget ones but there we go! Dinocroc Vs Supergator seems to go one further by blatantly laying on the crap-factor by setting up comical deaths and having a script that makes no sense at all. The acting standard really varies throughout. Watch as Delia Sheppard almost dares to show panic when the creatures escape as she almost raises her voice to say “everybody out”. It’s the opening line and I was already in stitches of laughter. Then the main actors Amy Raisimas and Corey Landis are revelling in their b-movie acting, laying it on very thick and hammy and then David Carradine is almost playing things in seriousness. The complete mixture of everything makes it so stilted its half the fun.

The Effects

One thing I will say about the film is that unlike a lot of these types of films, there’s actually quite a lot of animal action. There are lots of little scenes constantly interspersing the film and it does make things run along nicely. It’s also a lovely Island setting too. The effects are hilarious and there’s one particular death scene where a lady is bitten in half and the remaining half left behind is some of the funniest CGI of a dead / living / dying woman I’ve seen in a while!

Why It’s Worth Watching

For its tongue in cheek, we know its awful but hey ITS AWFUL attitude. Everyone seems to be enjoying themselves and it translates onto the screen.

Best Death

The aforementioned stupid “babes” who have the funniest death scene. I was howling so loud. Honourable mention for Jeff Rector who gets an entire building wall fall onto him.

Weirdest Moment

Quite frankly the leading duo have about thirty minutes together before they have a “don’t die now” snog and declare undying love. It comes from absolutely nowhere at all as they’ve not really flirted up to then either. I was a little shocked and gobsmacked  when it took place, least of all with a third-party watching.

Conclusion

You will either love it or loathe it, there’ll be no in-between. An absolute cult classic and bad film making and its all the better for committing fully to that route.

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Film Review: Tsunami: The Aftermath

Posted in Tsunami: The Aftermath with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 26, 2011 by Higher Plain Music

  When I first heard about Tsunami The Aftermath my first initial reaction was “too soon”. Other disasters are left alone for at least a good decade before they’re poked and prodded by producers. How could you serialise the biggest natural disaster we’ve experienced for such a very long time? A lot of people are still recovering, surviving and getting their lives back on track. Perhaps by avoiding the whole tragedy and focusing purely on the aftermath, this mini-series manages to stay the right side of exploitation by keeping purely to the emotional side of things and how to pick up the pieces.

The Premise

Following on from the Asian Tsunami, we follow a group of survivors and aiders as they try to reunite with loved ones and save as many lives as they can.

The Disasters Faced

Aside from the Tsunami and ensuing drama we have a lot of government red tape to stop all and sundry as well as land stealers.

The Execution

Perhaps wisely, aside from a few real life shots taken from video cameras, the Tsunami itself is contained to a very small section of the film. Instead we follow a couple whose lost their child, a reporter, a Thai worker, a small family and a few aid workers as they cross paths with each other on their search for survival. The camerawork is kept smooth and steady. There’s no production frills on any artistic judgements on any level. There’s no hint of exposition for entertainments sake. Everything is focused on the people we are following and with a collection of fine actors and actresses, the story, while slow but constantly evolving, is kept purely centre to everything. Chiwetel Ejiofor, Sophie Okonedo and Toni Collette were particular stand outs for me with their sheer range and pitch perfection to the sensitive nature of the story. The realistic portrayal of how parents can utterly shatter apart when they’ve lost their child is heartwrenchingly played out as you see Ejiofor and Okonedo ebb away. There’s no weak link in the acting front at all and although perhaps the journalistic side of things maybe weren’t my cup of tea in general, even they were handled with dignity and respect.

The Effects

The actual Tsunami itself is shown via very short clips of real footage mixed with close camera proximity of Ejiofor in the water. Aside from that the sheer background devastation in the sets looks both horrific and magnificent. The reconstruction of some of the sets is astounding due the sheer depth of broken debris. Everywhere looks absolutely trashed to bits and the hotel set at the beginning is particularly saddening.

Why It’s Worth Watching

While it may be far too soon for some, Tsunami The Aftermath is an emotional rollercoaster that will affect most viewers. It is a slow burner and to some, I can see that they don’t think a lot happens. Most of the film is character based, talking, interaction with others and the hitting-a-head-against-a-wall as people try to help but find too much blocking their way. It’s an introspective film about how to deal with loss from either losing a parent or a child, or even your whole family and being the sole survivor. It’s also interesting to see how even different organisations struggle to work together to help others. It also touches on some of the less positive events that happened after the Tsunami such as companies trying to claim land from washed away settlements. The fact it doesn’t paint everyone perfectly makes everything much more human too.

Favourite Character

It has to be Toni Collette’s character whose single-minded approach to trying to get aid out may anger others but it’s that kind of grit and determination that gets things done in a crisis.

Weirdest Moment

Not particularly weird but I found Samrit Machielsen’s character repeating “all gone” a lot was a bit of a shame and his character deserved more time. He had lost the most and yet seemed to be the least emotional of the cast, simply trying to rebuild again. Whilst I understand that different cultures have different ways of dealing with loss, it just seemed his character development stunted way short. I also struggle a little with things being so British / tourist focused. I understand it from a tv point of view but the Thai people are left out and indeed are extras in the back of the set which is insensitive.

Conclusion

Emotionally devastating and powerhouse acting and set design all round make Tsunami The Aftermath something that will stick with you for a while afterwards. Too soon? Everyone’s of their own ilk and opinion, but when you are ready, this is a well-balanced tribute to all involved.

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Film Review: Stonehenge Apocalypse

Posted in Stonehenge Apocalypse with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 18, 2011 by Higher Plain Music

It’s low-budget sci-fi, it’s where Americans tell the Brits how its done, it’s where Foamhenge takes over the world! Well almost…

The Premise

Stonehenge appears to be a countdown clock to doomsday and it suddenly pops into life and decides it wants to use electromagnetic energy (that old chestnut) to wipe the world anew and start from scratch. Not good news for us then!

The Disasters Faced

Foamhenge, a lot of butchered British accents, volcanoes, electromagnetic discharges and your run of the mill end of the world cult.

The Execution

Stonehenge Apocalypse is an interesting beast. It mascarades as a disaster movie but ends up being more of a run around a lot low-budget sci-fi chase movie. After a pant wettingly comedic opening disaster (which is actually the best bit sadly) we’re set into a race against time to work out what’s going on with ole Hengey. The problem is mainly that the film itself doesn’t explain what’s going on clearly and plot lines pick up, drop and then resurface in such random clumps sometimes you’re left scratching your head. If anything though, it then makes you stick with it because it is so bitty and confusing to begin with. Eventually it all ties back together for the grande finale showdown. Will the world end? Of course not, but we’ll gladly watch everyone overact and exclaim “Oh…my…..GOD!” over and over while we reach the conclusion.

The Effects

The foamhenge’s moving around scene is just so surreal – I give top marks to whomever envisaged that. It’s so funny to watch as well. There’s one scene where Angkor explodes into a volcano and also another where the Pyramids turn into mechanisms and detonate  but its over so quickly using CGI that could have come from a late PlayStation 1 game you’ve barely time to take it all in. In fact, the effects shots are very sparse throughout. Most of the money is spent on getting sets yoinked from various other SyFy channel backlots it seems!

Why It’s Worth Watching

Confusing as it may be at times, the 85 minute mark sets up S.A. to be a fast paced film. While it has TV movie written all over it, you can see  people have tried very hard to put some love into it. The acting is over the top ham and the script doesn’t help (“It’s a ROBOT HEAD!!!”). In fact every time anyone does anything to defy logic you should have a shot of alcohol. I guarantee you, you’ll be on the floor after 45 minutes.

Favourite Character

It’s got to be Marla. For the first half of the film, maybe even an hour, she only spills a cup of coffee. Then suddenly she’s a main character from nowhere for about twenty minutes before meeting her end in a camp horror fashion. The accent wasn’t that bad!

Best Death

The opening segment is pure comedy gold. Watch as frightened tourists watch and gasp as Stonehenge spins around them only for them to be electrocuted to dust moments later. The tour guide looks like she’s auditioning for Carry-On Disaster!

Weirdest Moment

The end baddie. It just doesn’t work at all.  Badly edited, the characters move around distance wise to such a massive degree its off-putting and well, after seeing off the main adversary earlier in the film, the final baddie just seems like he needs a hug, a meal and a woman and then he’ll settle down.

Conclusion

Stonehenge Apocalypse isn’t the worst disaster movie (or best depending on your view) but its premise is comedy gold. The opening five minutes shows you the best part of the film. The rest is entertaining for myriad of good and bad reasons. However I would watch it again. It could become a cult guilty pleasure and combined with the drinking game above, a good staple to the awful film drinking nights I hold on occasion.

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Film Review:”Battle of Los Angeles”

Posted in Battle of Los Angeles with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 14, 2011 by Higher Plain Music

The Asylum are utter geniuses. How they have evaded being taken to court over the title of their latest “epic” I have no idea, but Battle of Los Angeles is quite possibly the most commical alien invasion film this side of Mars Attacks – but that was meant to be a comedy! The result is a film that’s so cheesy, so camp and late 80′s one liner filled its a riot.

The Premise

A giant UFO squid type thing has designs on planet Earth to steal back a captive alien from Roswell. Cue destruction!

The Disasters Faced

CGI, CGI and more CGI. Then throw in a few super soaker guns, a tarted up trash can, a lot of stolen ideas and dodgy implementation. What a concoction!

The Execution

Battle of Los Angeles is strangely familiar – and it’s not just the title. From the stolen opening scenes (Independence Day), stolen lines of dialogue (Terminator), set pieces (District 9), characters (Kill Bill) and even shouting movies names to remind others of what they’re meant to do (Avatar) – absolutely nothing in this film seems its own. Everything revolves around jumping from one films set piece to another – hamfisting it – and then bungling onto the next one. In fact the film feels in a way like a homage to about 30 different films all taking place in ninety minutes. You’d be forgiven for thinking its a parody but because it’s not, it comes across priceless funny. The direction seems aimed at a Power Rangers audience but with blood and swearing. It’s such a strange offset that initially I felt like the film was jarring but after the first twenty minutes I was so busy laughing my head off I didn’t care anymore. The scripts full of stupid one liners and the death counts high. The plots ludicrous and while most of the acting isn’t bad (especially from the lead trio) there’s still a few really stilted performances to make you smile.

The Effects

Well… they’re in general awful. The Asylum need to work out how to improve their CGI explosions – they’re shocking! The aircraft work is passable, the alien at the end isn’t bad at all and the sets are fine. It’s just that whenever a flame appears on-screen the whole illusion of the film fades away. It’s a miracle that the film had anything going on at all with its budget so its testament to the team in charge that it didn’t all end up a complete shambles.

Why It’s Worth Watching

Battle of Los Angeles is a trip down bad movie memory lane. Everyone has set out to make the film the best a B movie can be and its pulled off perfectly. The two female leads especially look like they’re having a great time wielding weapons, kissing missile launchers and leaping 30 feet down off a bridge with a katana… unhurt! It’s full of continuity errors too. What for the magic eyepatch. You can also play guess the deaths as characters fall by te wayside at the rate of Notts. You’ll only enjoy it if you enjoy cheesy movies however – I can’t stress this enough!

Best Death

Commander Pike’s voice must have really peeved the aliens. After taking out several spaceships with the smallest gun known to the army, he then gets too cocky when he takes an aliens laser gun and sets it off on fellow alien ships. Sadly one of them decides if he’s going down, he’ll take Pike with him and he crashes down right on the guy! Double whammy!

Favourite Character

Solano kicks so much arse in this film, she earns the award – or she might kill us too! From screaming cheesy come backs from her parachute, to kissing her rocket launcher to aerial kicking gun slinging, she firmly does the most damage. Typically she goes out in big style too in a self-sacrifice but we’re sure it’s only so she can win best explosion award!

Weirdest Moment

Best laugh out loud moment is Karla’s entrance to the film, jumping off a 30ft bridge with a katana, slamming it down onto the alien ship, killing it, riding it to the ground, sliding off and then walking away without flinching as it explodes in flames behind her. It’s so cheesy it could be a hair shampoo or tampon advert.

Conclusion

If you don’t enjoy cheesy awful films, you’ll hate this. I don’t believe it deserves its 2.1 score on IMDB but I can complete see why others wouldn’t watch it. However, those of us who are avid fans of the bad movie bandwagon – sign yourselves up – this is an absolute corker!

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Film Review: “In Old Chicago”

Posted in In Old Chicago with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 24, 2011 by Higher Plain Music

Time for us to delve back to 1937 for this disaster movie classic “In Old Chicago” where brotherly love is the last thing on the agenda and stalking is game of the day!

The Premise

The O’Leary family move to Chicago the 1850′s and proceed to rip the entire town to pieces with their family feuds and a dozy cow called Daisy that sets the whole place alight.

The Disasters Faced

The great Chicago fire of 1871, warring brothers, endless hammy musical numbers, a stampede (!), a lot of licking (!!!) and the O Leary’s having the polar opposite of a midas touch.

The Execution

It’s interesting to go back to 30′s cinema to see exactly what was acceptable and / or provocative in those days. Any chance for a lady to swoon for her man, sing a song and submit is used. Any excuse for a man to be flashy and loud is also used. The UK sadly only has the 91 minute edited version on release although if it were musical numbers that were cut, I’m none too fussed about losing those! What is here though is a 70 minute family feud between two brothers. One runs a popular “seedy” (read lady sings song and wiggles skirt) club called “The Patch”, the other is a respectable lawyer who becomes Major and wants said club removed. Tensions between them boil and when mummy dearest starts off the Chicago fire, the brothers clash thinking it was foul play and not an accident. The remaining 20 minutes follows the fire and we watch to see whom survives. Not a lot has changed in the genre in 80 years has it! In fact this film itself was said to be mimicking “San Francisco”, an earthquake movie released at the same time. Some of the best 30′s cinematography and effects are on view here and still hold up incredibly well in this day and age. While cultures and times have changed – the need for blowing things up has stayed true to the core. Go humans!

The Effects

Being filmed in black and white makes for more forgiving times for In Old Chicago on the special effects front. The town sets look very much like a backlot set by how squared everything is however the actual fire itself is still very impressive. The flames are real, buildings collapse, factories explode (albeit looking a bit polystyrene) and there’s some extremely impressive wide shots that I really didn’t believe were possible in that day. One particular scene sees a detonation of a line of buildings to stop the fire spreading further and this explodes out onto and kills two characters – it looks fantastic! You can tell the film took 22 months to make just by the sheer destruction in the last phase of the film.
I’d take that over some of the tv movie cgi hazards on our screens anyday!

Why It’s Worth Watching

It’s worth watching as a good family drama with a big budget ending. The fight scene with the two brothers is comic gold as the camera is undercranked and so the men fly across the room at high-speed! The romance between Tyrone Power and Alice Faye is one of the most bizarre I’ve ever seen. Watch as Power first throws money at her, then attacks her in her wagon, then breaks into her house and pins her to the floor and all but forces himself on her before he declares he’s only there to make money off her “talents”. Alice Faye suddenly smiles and kisses him!!! How about phoning the police and having him sectioned!!! Watch as the Swedish milk maid screams “Ya” through the entire movie. It’s dated approach is what endears it to us of times gone by where things are seen with rose tinted glasses. The fire itself is reason alone to watch too. Finally its also worth watching to see your reaction at the end of the movie when the mother declares that things are sent to try us and they have to start anew. Lady, its all your bloody fault! The family has a death wish.

Best Death

While I can think of three memorable deaths, the winner goes to Brian Donlevy who manages to escape the chicago fire, only to be killed in a stampede instead! It’s worse than when Slim Pickens survives the entire Poseidon Adventure films and then gets shot dead swimming to the rescue boat. Epic fail!

Favourite Character

Hattie (Madame Sultewae) is hilarious as the servant to Alice Faye. Managing to get away with the same awful joke twice and spending her entire on scream time running round screaming “help, police”. Very underrated and by the fact on imdb she has 52 credits to her name, yet the vast majority are uncredited is a shame to both her skill and black actors and actresses of that time.

Weirdest Moment

There are many but the best weirdest moments are those where instead of beating someone up, the word of the era was “licking”. Cue classic lines throughout the film such as one brother saying to another “I haven’t licked you since we got to Chicago! ad infinitum. You’d still be arrested for that interfamily act now boys…

Conclusion

Due for its 75th  anniversary very shortly, In Old Chicago may have some outdated language and social standards but it’s still a very enjoyable film. The special effects have held up surprisingly well and the fire is beautifully captured. If you can take your disaster with a large order of family drama and four musical numbers (thankfully in the first half) then this is your ideal movie. For everyone else, it’s a great introduction to early cinema.

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Film Review: Aftershock / Tangshan Dadizhen

Posted in Aftershock with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on January 23, 2011 by Higher Plain Music

I’m loving the fact that we’re finally getting a flurry of Eastern disaster movies flying across to the European pond. “Aftershock” was a massive success in its homeland China and deserves every accolade thrown at it. A harrowing tale that takes disaster movies into a much more realistic and serious emotional journey – Aftershock breaks the mould.

The Premise

After a massive Earthquake tears a family of four to shreds, we watch the effects one decision has left on everyone for the next thirty years.

The Disasters Faced

Earthquakes, falling buildings, big concrete slabs, the lack of a sat nav in the afterlife and one armed cyclists.

The Execution

The earthquake takes place just a few minutes into the film and is all over in the first twenty however its effects resonate throughout this epic. This movie is much more geared to towards to emotional drama that sees a mother have to choose which child to save and which to leave to die. Upon choosing her son, leaving her daughter for dead, the two embark on a taut life together in mourning and pressured love. The son can never live up to the extra responsibility to honour his sister and father and the mother is utterly lost in guilt and mourning for her loved ones. Unknown to her, her daughter is not dead and heard the entire ordeal and so spends her life in fostering and never quite feeling good enough. The acting is superb and the script’s translation although clumsy in a few spots really makes for a powerful drama as all their lives inter-cross but never quite meet. It’s on these performances and the good pacing as we fast-forward in ten year intervals to see how their lives are still broken that the film wins you over.

The Effects

The Earthquake is over quite quickly but is very well done with that slightly drawn CGI style that seems to permeate all eastern disaster movies these days. It works nicely and the sets of destruction after and rebuilding are brutal. There are some thoughtful long shots however of never-ending body counts and fires for memorial that bring home the scale that are great touches too.

Why It’s Worth Watching

Aftershock is an emotional drama first and foremost and the actors are fantastic. The story will see you rooting for everyone as they sink further and further into despair as you hope for their reunion. Yes the disaster elements are there and they do a great job for providing such a brutal backdrop but this is one for the tissue box!

Best Death

Only one named character dies in the earthquake but best death goes to the daughters foster mum (Jin Chen) for her emotional and regretful death bed speech.

Favourite Character

This is a real dilemma but I think the daughter Fang is the one you’re most emotional attached to and so when you see all that she’s been through, you can forgive most of her mistakes although Mr Wang, the foster father should be present in everyone’s family!

Weirdest Moment

If your not wrapped up in the story, possibly seeing poor Mum (Fan Xu) scream crying at everyone for a good ten minutes may leave you unsettled! I personally was right with her! Also, damn her selfish mother for trying to take her son away too – she was evil!

Conclusion

If you’ve come for special effects and big budget action sequences you’ll be sorely disappointed  Aftershock is an emotional roller-coaster that spans decades and countless mountains to climb. It’s quite unlike any other disaster movie I’ve watched to date and should find itself a place on everyone’s DVD shelf. Superb.

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Film Review: Right At Your Door

Posted in Right At Your Door with tags , , , , , , , , , on November 19, 2010 by Higher Plain Music

Right At Your Door is a claustrophobic  taut disaster thriller about exactly how you would react with split decisions in a crisis and how they effect others. Thought provoking, although full of melodrama, its an interesting film that absolutely deserves to be seen.

The Premise

When a dirty bomb is set off in downtown LA, a couple are separated with one inside and safe and the other stuck outside already contaminated. What exactly would you do in such a situation?

The Disasters Faced

Dirty bombs, gas chambers and the potential of running out of duct tape!

The Execution

Right At Your Door is a low budget film and almost all of it takes place at a single house yet it feels so much bigger. Relatively quick to drop you straight into the dirty bomb scenario, running round with a character (Rory Cochrane) trying to work out what’s going on and find his wife (Mary McCormack) with an endless radio feed spewing out in disorientating and frightening. You never see the bombs go off, or the devastation downtown but the story revolves around the fact that Rory seals up his house with a neighbour and lock themselves in safety. Much later along comes Mary still alive against all hope but contaminated. Rory can’t let her in as he effectively would kill him and his neighbour but in doing so he is sending his wife to her certain death. It poses the whole question of what do you do and the ambiguous characters who while aren’t massively likeable clearly love each other and are both very scared and you could veer either way. The movie is well directed and although it falls a bit flat in the middle as the film spends a lot of time selling the whole point without having much character progression, the last half hour where help arrives is very taut again.

The Effects

As everything takes place in a house, you only get a few effective wide shots of smoke pouring up from the city skyline and some impressive chemical ash scenes.

Why It’s Worth Watching

The films premise is interesting in that you make split second decisions along with the character of Rory along with him and its quite thought-provoking in that respect. It’s very taut when the emotions are running high and the ending is quite harrowing. It’s also a good point to note that is really the fact that help is on the way when it really might not be is a carrot dangling activity that is very dangerous.

Best Death

Now that would be spoiling which one of the pair doesn’t make it!

Favourite Character

With only really four proper characters in the film I’ll go with Mary McCormack for spending half the film coughing up all kinds of wonders!

Weirdest Moment

There’s not really a weird moment in the film but I did notice in one sheet of plastic between our two characters has several holes in it! Oops!

Conclusion

I really enjoyed Right At Your Door as its got a different feel for a disaster movie. It makes you ask what would you do. It’s very emotionally draining if it grips you but then that’s the point. There’s no big effects, this is more about the personal struggles of facing a massive disaster and it does the job admirably!

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Film Review: 2012 Doomsday

Posted in 2012 Doomsday with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 4, 2010 by Higher Plain Music

Dear God,

Should the Mayan’s be right, please deliver 4 guides to a random monument so they can deliver a new baby Jesus and save the world by repenting their sins and starting anew…oh – 2012 Doomsday you say? Hmmm….

The Premise

Four people feel a call to travel to Mexico on the last day of Planet Earth on a spiritual journey. Picked a fine day to do so!!!

The Disasters Faced

Volcanoes, Earthquakes, Tidal Waves, Trees, Food Poisioning, Bad Acting, Awful Scripts, Irratating Voices and Babies in Temples!

The Execution

Oh dear. Obviously thrown together to try to rinse some of 2012′s success, this film’s 85 minute religious hoccum revolves around four people who like to scream things like “I must go!” and “I’m going with you!” while they becomes enlightened by the fact that Christianity is King apparently.

From the awful script, the actors of varying degrees of ability are thrown into stupid situations. One lady decides to trek across the continent overnight because she saw a temple in her dream and then on a dead man. One lady is wandering around trekking with a tribe in the Jungle, with her fully charged cell phone of course meeting random men who then wander around aimlessly in the jungle with her. Nothing really makes sense at all and then suddenly a lady who barely says two words all film and is in only a few scenes is chucked on a stone throne and pops out Jesus II The Revenge and suddenly “the End of the World” stops. That’s one powerful push from mankind!

Random eh?

I love the fact that one character basically screams her way through the film. I love the fact that people just agree to travel across the Jungle with people they’d never met before because its “destiny”. I love the fact this film is completely irredeemable!

The Effects

Well, the effects are kept to an absolute minimum. The volcano at the beginning is passable, the earthquakes are just camera shakes and the tidal waves and tornadoes are only really hinted at. It’s dissapointing that it cuts away from all these disaster without showing anything that happens to them. It then means you’ve sat through utter tripe for nothing!

Why It’s Worth Watching

The acting is over the top helerious. Some of the voices are just so… not of this world! There are so funny deaths of non main characters, almost all the deaths you can forecast within their first few scenes. The actual cinematography isn’t too bad and some of the stuff around Mexico looks quite good but effects, music, everything else basically, is so cheap its good to laugh at. It’s also fun to spot the errors going on like camera rails in the shot and leaves not blowing in the wind etc.

Best Death

I found the man squashed by a huge ball of volcanic rubble to be the most fun!
Favourite Character

I can honestly say none of the four main characters were nice at all. I found them all bitter and whiny. Why God chose them to be messengers to deliver Jesus II the Revenge I have no idea! At least Alex, played by Joshua Lee, was a nice helpful guy but we all know what happen to those in disaster movies…

Weirdest Moments

The whole day changing to night as Jesus II is born. The whole thing just slaps heavy handed Christian brainwash properganda rubbish and the whole film is go geared towards being enlightened by this act, its just uncomfortable.

Conclusion

2012 Doomsday is a lesson in how not to make a movie. It’s shockingly awful from start to finish with no rewarding merits apart from perhaps making it a drinking game for whenever someone mentions “End of the World”, “Fate”, “I must go there” or some Christian symbol is thrown in for good measure. You’ll be slaughtered 20 minutes in!

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Film Review: Tycus

Posted in Tycus with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 28, 2010 by Higher Plain Music

A disaster movie about a comet causing havoc starring Dennis Hopper?! How did no one know about this film? Well… its a bit…rubbish. Well it’s not that its rubbish, its just it tries far too hard to be a jack of all trades and ends up being a master of none and skips all the big issues it could tackle by descending into the silly one liner territory.

The Premise

Tycus is a comet that everyone bar one man has said will never cause us a problem is actually going to crash into the moon and thus send various chunks of it down to Earth effectively ruining our way of life forever. However the rather rich man has decided to build a modern day Noahs Ark to house a select few people in but not everyone is happy with the rules.

The Disasters Faces

Comets, moon shards, earthquakes, tornadoes, volcanoes, a dodgy lift and everyone’s general greediness!

The Execution

Tycus starts with the films ending, although you don’t actually know it is yet and in effect displays all its special effects shots in the first 10 minutes. After that you are introduced the most unloving married couple possibly paired in recent memory, the husband of which is a secret agent newspaper journalist who’s been a soldier… and that’s where it starts to get silly! The film bills itself as a disaster movie however the very brief disaster montages (which don’t look too bad for a low budget film) are blotted out for what turns more into an unfocused one soldier against all mission. Then when it flicks back to a race against time disaster movie the film ends up feeling very bitty and clumsy.

The acting varies on a vast scale. Dennis Hopper does the best he can with the script he’s got while our lead man Peter Onorati can’t quite balance serious and comical but that’s not down to his acting abilities, its the god awful script! Plot holes and general silliness in scene set ups make for things to feel even worse too.

The Effects

Miniatures are used to good effect in the film and although some of the special effects look quite dated now, they are actually better than a lot of the sheer awfulness some of the TV disaster movies try to put out these days. It also has to be said I was quite impressed at the varied stunts that took place and the large scale sets that were used for what appears to be a low budget release.

Why It’s Worth Watching

Well something kept me until the movies end (which was a bit strange I must say) and I think its the combination of seeing if anything would actually happen, to see how bad the one liners would get and to see how heavy handed the script writers would deal with the whole “who gets to live and die” overtone of the movie. As a result, they actually completely ignore it and stay with a bitching session for the entire second half of the movie. It’s quite good then for being a mindless popcorn flick if you like to pick holes in the film after!

Favourite Character

Slim pickings for this movie as there’s no real character development at all but the plane flying commander (Blake Scott) is probably the best character in the movie as the stereotypical crazed nutcase that every disaster movie must have.
Best Death

I could see it coming from a mile off but the only death that made any sense at all was Dennis Hoppers as if to hammer home the whole “help as many as you can” motto that’s bashed over your head constantly.

Weirdest Moment

Some of the awful one liners are so clumsy they jar you but the whole preachy ending with a couple of people sat in a feild reading the film out of a story book as if its some fable was really quite random and therefore wins the award!

Conclusion

Tycus is a silly, unfocused melodrama between two men who both spend the entire film screwing each other over to justify their own means and end up being both hypocritical and self centred  This combined with some really bad plot holes, semi shoddy effects and a vast range of acting abilities (and inserted comedy moments?!?) make for a film that is just as good to watch on its bad merits as it is trying to take it on face value. Best served with a beer and some popcorn!

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Haeundae: Trailer & IMDB

Posted in Haeundae with tags , , , , , , on January 3, 2010 by Higher Plain Music

Haeundae (or Tidal Wave in the English speaking world) was Korea’s first disaster movie and it’s pretty good! You can view the trailer here and the IMDB page too.

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